


Inferno

by ApolloWD



Category: Wings of Fire - Tui T. Sutherland
Genre: F/M, Headcanon, LGBTQ Character, LGBTQ Female Character, LGBTQ Themes, Light Angst, Misgendering, Tags May Change, Trans, Trans Character, Transgender, Transgender Peril, Transphobia, deadnaming, sfw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-08-26
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:28:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25290118
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ApolloWD/pseuds/ApolloWD
Summary: TRANS PERIL AU / HEADCANONTW: Misgendering, deadnaming, transphobia, some violence (It is Wings of Fire, after all)Peril is misgendered and deadnamed by herself and the story prior to her realizing that she is trans. As such, if this is a triggering topic for you, I would suggest that you not read the story, or skip the first few chapters.Inferno knows there's something wrong with him. He knows that his differences extend outside of the burning scales covering his body. He knows that he's wrong on the inside, too. And when he finally discovers the truth- that he is a dragoness, that SHE is who she truly is beneath her scales, and that not all of the SkyWing kingdom will accept that- that throws everything else out the window.And Inferno- no, Peril -likes it that way.
Relationships: Clay/Peril (Wings of Fire)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 22





	1. Embers

**Author's Note:**

> Hey, this is actually the first fanfiction I've ever posted. It would be great if you could post critique in the comments, but please don't be too harsh, as this is a story I hold very close to my heart. As well as this, please don't comment on the headcanon itself. Thanks!

The crimson dragonet opened his eyes with a slow blink. Next to him, he could see his twin. His brother, the one with the same rough head shape and slightly pale, orange-red scales- but something was wrong. The dragonet, Inferno could see it; his brother was _too_ small, _too_ shriveled, _too_ desaturated. His brother was just _wrong._ While Inferno had golden cracks decorating his scaled, shining with a fiery light, the other dragonet had none of the sort. He was grayish, and a strange peach color instead of a deep orange-red like the rest of his tribe  
  
As Inferno reached out a curious talon to examine his still-sleeping twin, black, dark, cruel scorch marks appeared where there should have been a soft imprint. As Inferno's eyes focused, he could see that these markings covered the small, pale SkyWing on every point that had made contact with his twin's body. Inferno stepped back, confused and frightened, the weight of his terror in every motion of his newly hatched limbs. His brother slowly began to open his eyes, sky blue like Inferno's, but pale and watery, like something diluted and empty.  
  
And somehow, somewhere in the pit of his stomach, Inferno knew that it was his fault.  
  
Inferno understood, for the first time, that _he_ was wrong.

* * *

  
**Several years later...**  
  
  
Inferno sighed heavily. _Of course. Kill another prisoner._  
  
_What else should I do? Spending all your time in murder arenas doesn't exactly leave room for hobbies._  
  
He looked down at his talons, then at his reflection in the shimmering golden statues strewn haphazardly throughout the palace, clearly a product of Scarlet's ego.

He saw his broad shoulders, his wide frame, and he growled. He knew he wasn't supposed to hate his body like this, but when everything else was _wrong,_ it was hard to think that his discomfort was more than just a symptom of the discontent and anger that had filled his life. He turned away, his talons scraping against the floor and leaving black marks where they touched it.

Inferno was a murderer- he has accepted that a long time ago. From the day he hatched, Inferno understood that there was something wrong with him- with his body, or maybe with his mind.  
  
He just didn't know that it wasn't all because of the arena.  
  
Inferno walked through the large corridors, every step a little too careless, dragons moving out of his way as they spotted him.

"Excuse me," he said, getting a little bit too close to a couple of sunset-colored SkyWings. He secretly relished in the terror that other dragons felt when they saw him. As Scarlet would say, it meant he was powerful- and fear is the greatest power of all. Even as he spoke, though, Inferno couldn't shove that _wrong_ feeling away. He couldn't push out the sensation that there was something- his voice, his body, whatever- that simply _wasn't him._

As he entered the arena, Inferno spotted his target. His icy, liquid blue eyes pierced into the SeaWing's deep green scales, and Inferno snorted, flexing his claws. _This will be easy,_ Inferno thought. Swiftly and without hesitation, Inferno clamped his talons around the SeaWing's throat, scorching it and killing the SeaWing. His body fell to the sandy floor with a sickening _crunch_. Inferno gazed around the room, growling softly.

  
  
Inferno exited the arena and returned to his quarters. As he lay down to sleep, he thought more about the things that had haunted him- seeing his silhouette in the gold statue, looking at his broad figure, and hearing his deep voice.  
  
"Inferno," he spoke, trying to raise his voice. Inferno. He always hated that name. It sounded cruel and violent, but not in an elegant way, not in a frighteningly calm, terrifyingly beautiful way- in a brutish, overly powerful, too-showy way.  
  
He often found himself envying the female dragons in his life. They had such beautiful, elegant, and sharp names. Inferno was a square name. A hard, wide name with sharp edges, but wide angles. _They_ were beautiful. It wasn't that Inferno loved any of them- instead, it was a sort of visceral, deep jealousy for them. Inferno almost felt that, if he could just be like them, it would relieve so much of the pain that coursed through every facet of his life.

Even trying to perform the brutish, powerful motions that Inferno's name demanded felt just like that- a performance in front of an audience of millions- like his entire life was a stageplay and he was reading the lines off of a scroll.  
  
As the SkyWing drifted into sleep, he was left with a final thought.  
_What is wrong with me?_


	2. Ashes

”Inferno, you have been summoned by our magnificent Queen Scarlet. Please adjourn to the throne room.”

The lanky SkyWing stood across the room, careful not to get too close to Inferno. His maroon scales and golden wings silhouetted a long, whip-thin body, and he stepped away and closer to the door, his message delivered and his task complete.

Inferno slowly forced his eyes open, sunlight bouncing across the room. The beams of bright light reflected off of his liquid eyes, casting shades of sky blue through his quarters. With a soft growl and muscles still pulled by the shackles of rest, Inferno slowly stood up and moved across the room, his eyes settling on the pile of black stones set out by Scarlet the night before.

Inferno had never liked the black rocks- they hurt his throat going down and tasted like charcoal and ash. Inferno understood _why_ he had to eat them- the last time he stopped, he had almost died- but that didn’t mean he had to enjoy the experience. With a hushed sigh of protest, Inferno resigned himself to his fate, the stone scraping his esophagus like always, before finally standing up to exit the room, leaving soft black marks on the floor. The maroon SkyWing moved out of the way, partially out of respect and mostly out of sheer terror.

On the way to the throne room, Inferno thought. He thought about his body, and his power, and his name. Inferno, the name that he despised so much, the name that constantly reminded him of everything he hated about his body. 

_I should have been born a dragoness,_ he suddenly realized. _I was supposed to be one, just like how I was supposed to have normal scales. Just like how my brother should be alive._

_And my name should have been... Peril._

* * *

Consumed in thought, Peril continued to walk. She tried it out in her head- calling herself “Peril” and “her.” It didn’t fill her with elation, but it did feel like one _right_ thing- and for a dragon who felt wrong for the first seven years of her life, they should have been synonymous. For just a little bit of time, Peril felt like she was okay, like she didn’t have to focus on everything wrong with her body, because she could just be right.

And then Scarlet spoke.

”Inferno,” the SkyWing queen began. The word felt like being stabbed through the heart- brutal and cruel. Peril unconsciously winced. “As you know, my hatching day is coming up in a few moons. I want you to impress me.”

”Yes, Queen Scarlet,” Peril nodded. “But, I have one small request of you,” she continued, embarrassment filling her.

”What is it, my Inferno?”

”It’s just that.. could you call me... Peril? And... refer to me as you would a dragoness.”

The SkyWing appeared confused for a moment. _“Peril?_ ” she asked, with a snicker in her voice and doubt in her eyes. “A _dragoness?_ ”

”Yes, my Queen. It would make me happier.”

”And tell me, _Inferno_ , why I should do that?”

In a flash, without thinking for a second, Peril had her claws on the SkyWing queen’s throat. As if some sort of dark spirit had possessed her, Peril held on, black marks forming under her talons as Scarlet’s scales melted and fused together. Finally, she let go, dropping the SkyWing to the floor.

”I-“ Peril began, looking at her talons. Blobs of melted red scales still clung to them like droplets of blood, and the queen let out a weak chuckle. “Forgive me, Queen Scarlet.”

”...Peril,” Scarlet spoke, her voice hoarse and muted. “Promise me one thing...”

The queen hesitated for a moment, then continued. ”Make my hatching day... _interesting._ ”


	3. Scorched

Her tail scraping against the floor, Peril’s heart raced. Thoughts swam in her head and she felt like her brain was running on high speed. _What_ _did I just do..?_ Peril thought, returning from the adrenaline high that the sudden attack had given her. _That was moronic. What if I had_ killed _Scarlet? What if she_ hadn’t _decided to be merciful? What if she had me executed?_ Peril shook her head, forcing her anxieties out. _She spared me. That’s all that matters._

Dark scorch marks covered the floor where the glowing SkyWing walked. As she looked down at her talons, sighing at the charcoal lines they marked on the gray stone, Peril bumped into another dragon- a pale, grayish SandWing. The dragon howled in pain, those same burns that coated the ground now covering the foreign dragon. Peril was startled- she liked feeling the power and fear that she instilled in other dragons, but this SandWing was _innocent._

Peril stepped back, terror in her eyes, as the SandWing collapsed to the ground. Their scales clung together, melted into an unrecognizable mass, and near the points that had made the most contact, they had turned an ugly shade of brown. The SandWing’s scales bore the same marks of injury that Scarlet’s throat did, and Peril was taken aback even more.

”I’m-“ Peril stuttered, her words catching in her throat as she choked on her own speech. “I- I’m so sorry.” Quickly, Peril sped away, leaving the SandWing and returning to her quarters. The swirling avalanche of thoughts that Peril was desperately trying to stave off quickly consumed her mind.

_Did you really think that telling Scarlet would help anyone? You almost killed two dragons today. Just being a dragoness and having a different name isn’t going to fix that. Parts of you might be right, sure, but your body is still wrong. Nobody is going to think you’re a female dragon, and you’ll just keep letting your temper control you. You keep hurting other dragons and you keep telling yourself that it’ll get better._

_But it’s not going to get better, is it?_

_You’re just going to keep hurting other dragons, aren’t you?_ _You’re just going to keep being Scarlet’s little monster. Her murder-pet_ _, her cute little killer._

_Don’t try and shut me up, because it’s true._ _You’re a killer, and that’s how you’ll always be._

_Isn’t that right,_ Inferno?

Peril squeezed her eyes shut, but the cacophony inside her head wouldn’t go quiet. Being called the wrong name hurt _,_ but that pain was nothing compared to being called that by _herself_. It felt like she was wrong about herself, like she was just confused and crazy. It felt like her own mind knew that she was faking it, somehow, and she just couldn’t handle being told that.

It felt like Peril was withholding something, and even she didn’t know what it was.

* * *

Entering her quarters, Peril stretched out. The thoughts had dissipated somewhat, and Peril was infinitely grateful for that. She knew that somehow, they would eventually return, but for now, Peril was okay. She twisted herself to look at her body, and she sighed. She had built up all this extra bulk, and now it was working against her- she didn’t even need it. Looking at the rabbit that had been left for her, Peril sighed. She didn’t need all of this extra body mass. Taking the rabbit in her jaws, she tossed it aside.

Peril slumped over onto her bed. It was still midday, but she had some time before she had to fight in the arena. She would take whatever brief respite she could. Slowly, her scarlet eyelids closed over her sky-blue eyes, and the soft, liquid glimmering that often coated them stopped, as Peril rested, safe for now.

Peril didn’t intend to rest for as long as she did. By the time her eyes finally shot open, the sun was low and weary on the horizon, and she was being called into the arena to fight another prisoner. Slowly, she walked down the hallway. It wasn’t that Peril hated the arena- she found it easy and fairly boring, to be perfectly honest- it was more that she was still shaken by the earlier encounter with the SandWing.

Her talons scraping against the dark stone, Peril entered the arena.

”...versus... **Peril!** ” a tall SkyWing called from above. Confused glances filled the arena, followed by soft murmuring.

”Peril? Who’s Peril?”

”That looks like Inferno!”

”Peril is a dragoness’ name, not a name for... _that._ ”

Reinvigorated and full of fresh anger, Peril searched the arena for her opponent. The moment she spotted her target, she focused on it, and let out a soft _oh no._ It was a SandWing, similar to the one she had bumped into earlier. She could see the terror in its glittering, dark eyes, and Peril shut her own to avoid having to look. Quickly she charged, focusing on the audience instead of her enemy, thinking about the SkyWings and MudWings watching instead of the SandWing under her talons. The sand dragon released a shriek as Peril ripped out their throat, blood sizzling on her claws and evaporating away.

”It is Inferno..” Peril could make out as she listened to the crowd.

”Why is he a ‘she’ now? Did he finally snap?”

”Looks like it.”

Peril growled, and slowly exited the arena, flying up to guard the prisoners. She flew in circles around the tall spires, not really focusing on any prisoners. There was nobody new today, no exciting dragons, just the same old fare. SeaWing, SeaWing, SandWing. SkyWing, IceWing, SeaWing. Peril wished there was another dragon, someone she could talk to so she didn’t feel so horribly _alone,_ but there was nothing.

Continuing her circular laps around the towers, Peril refused to land until the last remnants of the sun sank below the horizon. Finally, she landed on the ground and returned to her quarters.

Although she was tired, Peril’s body refused to let her sleep- in the night, she had nothing to focus on but how terrible she felt. She was brutally hungry from the arena, but she needed a more feminine physique, without those bulky muscles and thick fat deposits. She took one last longing gaze at the rabbit on the floor, before finally letting her tiredness overtake her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of this section is based off of my own intrusive thoughts and experiences as a trans man. Although I recognize that my experience is not universal, many of the things I recognize I have applied in reverse.


	4. Reignited

**\- SEVERAL DAYS LATER -**

Peril opened her eyes. She stretched, taking note of the way she had thinned out. She _had been_ eating less, but eventually, the growling pit in her stomach taught her that that wasn’t all that wise. After some deliberation, she instead vowed to exercise the parts of her body which she actually _liked_ , and it was beginning to pay off. She felt more slender, and as the light bounced around the room, she could see the reflection of her scales, filled with a new glow.

As Peril stood up, she felt as though a weight had been lifted off her chest. She still got looks from other dragons, and they stung her like they always had, but she found that simply looking back was enough to silence them. Peril was _powerful._ She understood that now more than ever. Yet, this confidence also raised questions in her, and with those, a deep emptiness inside.

_If I was wrong about myself... what else am I wrong about? If my own tribe can’t accept me, who can?_

Even with these thoughts swimming around her head, though, Peril was a lot happier than she used to be. She felt free and confident, and every intrusive question was more of a subtle whisper in her head. As she exited her cell, preparing to make her daily rounds around the prison towers, Peril felt _strong._ She raised her head high and flew into the air, circling around the massive spires and running a single talon along the dark, smooth stone. Webbed black lines lagged behind her claws, leaving their mark on both the prisoners and the structures that held them. Letting out a soft smile, somehow kind and cruel at the same time, Peril continued with her laps. She searched around for any new dragons- she had heard something about there being special prisoners there for Queen Scarlet's hatching day. She wasn't sure that she believed them, but that wouldn't stop her.

As she flew around the tall, dark spires, Peril found her cerulean eyes looking in every direction for unfamiliar scale colors. She saw the pale blues of an IceWing's shimmering body, the white and gold patterning of a SandWing, the deep gold and brown of a MudWing- _wait, a MudWing?_

Peril turned around to examine the new dragon, and as she did, she found her eyes unconsciously searching for his. As they met, the MudWing's filled with confusion and terror, and Peril's filled with something deeper. She found herself staring into the golden-brown eyes of the strange dragon, and once they finally locked together, not just looking _at_ each other but _into_ each other, Peril realized what that deeper feeling was. She was barely willing to accept that conclusion- there had to be some other explanation. Immediate infatuation was not a familiar feeling for Peril- she was always too busy thinking about herself. Her heart rushing to her stomach, all of her thoughts converged onto one singular point.

_I'm in love._

As Peril came to this realization, she scrambled to find words. Eventually, though, she just found herself telling the unfamiliar dragon her name in what was likely the worst way possible, probably scaring him away forever.

 _Dammit. I blew it. I could have told him_ anything, _and instead, I told him that I would murder him- and I hate that even more because it's true. I'm going to kill him, and I'm probably going to be happy about it. I love him... but this is who I'm supposed to be._

_I'm supposed to be a monster.  
_

* * *

Peril lifted her wings, slow and determined. Just a few hours ago, she had felt like nothing could stop her- but now it seemed as though there was a massive boulder, crushing her and squeezing out every last drop of confidence. She put on her mask, plastering on a sociopathic grin as she continued to fly around the spires, eventually coming to a resting place to watch the arena. The announcer yelled out the participants for the current battle, and from that, Peril could glean three things.

_The MudWing's name is Clay. He is one of the Dragonets of Destiny. He is going to die._

Peril had seen the other contestant, Fjord. He was brutal and ruthless. She knew that, if he won this match- and that was practically a given- she would be sent in the next to take him out. It was a guarantee. If you won enough times, you would go free.

Queen Scarlet made sure that nobody went free.

Peril instinctively flinched, feeling pity for Clay. She was infatuated with him. That was obvious. As the announcer called the match, Peril shut her eyes.

Peril heard a scream.

It wasn't coming from Clay.

She turned her eyes to Fjord, who was desperately clutching at his face. Peril could make out something thick and black seeping between his scales, burning them like her touch burned other dragons. Peril stepped back, happy that Clay wasn't dead, but horrified at what that meant. She scrambled for another conclusion but arrived at the same one every time.

_I'll be the one to kill him._


	5. Glow

Peril stopped and took a moment to think things over. The shock of her realization had come over her like a wave, and as it drew back she could think more clearly. 

_You're going to have to fight him, but that doesn't mean you have to win. He's clearly the most powerful dragon here, and he might even be able to defeat_ me. _And if he can, I don't have to kill him. Is that a positive? A negative? He already hates me, so maybe fighting him won't be so bad if I can just learn to see it as another kill. It's my duty. I don't want to disobey Scarlet._

As her head spun, another wave of shock came over her. _It's him or me_. _Let me lose my feelings for him. Let me survive._ Peril lowered her wings and glided down to where Clay stood.

"...You were amazing today," she finally spoke. It wasn't a lie. Peril was impressed with Clay. As she continued, memories from the night before shook her. She must have repressed them, but now they flooded back to her.

_It was a routine assignment._

_She had been assigned to kill a dragon- a SandWing named Horizon. It was routine. Afterward, she had talked with the MudWing._

_And she had told Clay everything._

Her twin.

Her mother.

Her _old self._

All of it came tumbling out before she could stop it. Clay had said _something._ She couldn't exactly remember his words- sleep was gripping her and trying to drag her away- but he had said something about being who he _wanted_ to be, not who he _had_ to be. That was easy for him to say.

Peril had done it once- to do it again would be a miracle. And anyways, Clay was a different dragon.

He couldn't kill with the same ease Peril could- or so she thought. Seeing the brown dragon kill Fjord so quickly, so horribly, so _easily_ sent Peril's mind spiraling into doubt. Maybe the two dragons were more similar to each other than Peril thought. Maybe that was why she felt such a strong connection.

 _There you go again. Getting familiar with your victims,_ a voice inside Peril's head taunted. _I thought you resigned to let go of those feelings. I thought you wanted to stop thinking of him in that way._

Peril was lost in thought- so lost, in fact, that she barely noticed Clay's response.

"Stop, Peril. It wasn't me."

She suddenly realized that she had been continuing the conversation without thinking, speaking to Clay but barely noticing what she was saying.

"...It's alright. I'd keep it a secret too, if I were you. Are you okay?" Peril replied, a hint of doubt in her voice.

"My wing's a little stiff. It's not too bad, though. I've been hurt before."

Peril gasped, looking at the frostbite markings on Clay's wing. "Not by an IceWing."

The brown MudWing looked at Peril, yellow eyes shimmering with hints of silver in the moonlight. Next to Peril's glow, he looked beautiful. His scales reflected shades of orange and yellow, mixing together into a soft amber that glistened in the warm light. For just a moment, Peril forgot their earlier conversation. For just a second, watching the amber dragon bask in her heat and seeing the way it warmed his scales and helped his frostbite, Peril felt normal. She reflected on what he had said, remembering it more clearly now that the initial shock of memory had subsided.

"I want to be who I _want_ to be. Not who I _have_ to be. Right?"

Thinking for a moment, Peril realized something. She agreed with him. She was _supposed to be wrong._

So maybe she could try to be right.


	6. Ash

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update, hope you enjoy!
> 
> I’ve sort of lost motivation for this fic, so I’ll be wrapping it up here, but I might make a continuation or something if I ever regain it.

Peril smiled, a genuine smile, and she knew that this wasn’t a simple infatuation. Lifting her wing above Clay, she tried to help him with the heat radiating off her, their scales never making contact. “I have an idea,” she declared after a moment. “Wait here.”

Lifting her wings into the sky, Peril brought them down with a gust of heated wind. She launched into the air, spiraling away for a few minutes, before finally returning.

As she got closer to Clay, it became clear that she was grasping a cauldron of mud. The SkyWing landed and placed it next to Clay. She placed a talon in, and immediately, the mud directly around it sizzled away. Growling in frustration, she instead slowly began pouring the contents onto the MudWing’s scales.

“Does this feel better?” she asked, determined not to let her frustration show.

”Y-yeah, actually,” Clay replied, a note of surprise edging his voice. “I could use something to eat, though. You have any cows?”

Peril couldn’t help but chuckle at the dragon’s remark. “Unless you like burned prey, no.”

Clay sighed as his stomach let out a discontented growl. “I’ll take it.”

”You’re funny like that, aren’t you?” She immediately felt a pang of regret. _You still have to kill him. You’re supposed to be sleek, intimidating, Scarlet’s little monster._

_So why do I love him so much?_

* * *

“You know, it probably wasn’t wise that you won against Fjord,” Peril finally broke the silence between the two dragons.

”What do you mean? It was him or me.”

The SkyWing sighed. “You don’t get it, do you? Even after all the times I’ve explained, you still don’t understand.”

Clay gave her an inquisitive look, mixed with a hint of guilt- although he was unsure why he felt it.

”This arena is rigged. After tonight, I don’t even know if Scarlet cares about me at all.”

”Doesn’t she give you the... you know, the...” Clay shook his head, trying to remember. “The black rocks! I mean, she’s totally evil, but at least she’s keeping you alive.”

Peril thought for a moment. “Yeah, but... maybe she just wants me to fight prisoners. Make her look scary. She hasn’t done a thing about the dragons in the stands. I’m lucky she let me live. It seems like, ever since the day I told her, she’s been looking at me like a piece of prey she wants to dispose of as soon as she can. I’m just dreading the moment she sells me to Burn’s freak show.”

Clay looked up at Peril, his eyes misty. “Do you think nobody cares about you?”

”I mean, it’s hard not to. Every day that I enter the arena, I have to hear the dragons in the stands. I always try not to listen, but it’s so hard. It’s so fucking hard.”

Clay was startled by the burst of foul language- the first time he had heard the SkyWing swear. “Peril-“

”Do you know what they say? They say ‘that’s no dragoness.’ They tell me that everything I work for is worthless.”

”Peril. _I_ care about you. I don’t understand, sure, and I’m not exactly sure I ever will. But I love you.”

Peril was expecting she would say it. She definitely wasn’t expecting Clay to return her feelings. And she certainly wouldn’t guess in a million years that he would confess to her.

”Are you just saying that because you feel bad for me?”

Clay shook his head. “No. I’m saying that because I love you.”

Peril hesitated for a moment, taking a deep breath.

”I love you too.”


End file.
